There is a security check point when you exit our gym. The security guard has 2 basic tasks:

  1. Check that your key is in your vehicle.
  2. To press a button to open the boom (for everyone’s protection from Covid-19).

For the past few weeks, this brother has decided to do something else during his working hours. Every day he places his chair underneath a tree a few meters away from the security check point.

Every time I exit the gym, I get furious! Why is he not doing his job? This is not very safe for Covid-19? Etc etc etc.

After a few weeks I would just press the button & ignore him sitting on the “beach”.

Until I caught myself.

I’ve created such a big gap between myself & this stranger that I cannot even look into his eyes anymore.

It didn’t feel good. I could feel the separation between us.

How did this happen?

This is a very simple example, but there is a very important key.

We’ve heard so many times in so many traditions “Do not judge thy neighbour”. But why?

We judge consciously & most of the time unconsciously all the time.

We judge outside of ourselves, but don’t really realise that it is a mere reflection of how we judge ourselves within.


Judgement = separation.

The moment that I ACCEPTED my brother’s decision to not do his job (for whatever reason), I could breathe again. The separation/gap disappeared. I could look him directly into the eyes and say “My Brother. I see you. Have a good day”. This acceptance & acknowledgement of who he is brought unity, compassion, intimacy, love & joy between us.

Acceptance dissolves separation.

The thing is that when we create separation (judge) outside, we create separation within (and vice versa). Separation within feels like depression, anxiety, loneliness etc.

In a time that we are forced to separate in so many different ways (creating even further separation between us), we can tip the scale in a simple way.


Acceptance of ourselves. Have you noticed how you judge yourself & perhaps felt the separation within? 

Accept our neighbours. Smile. Wave. Acknowledge the “stranger”. Look into the eyes of another.

We are all in this together & we cannot afford any further separation between us.

Accept whatever is needed for you personally outside of yourself, but most importantly within.